Played

Skulls
Tats
Skull tats
Full sleeve
Harleys
Baggy pants past your ass, boxers showin’
Nose piercing
Eyebrow piercing
Gangsta rap with angry lyrics about shit you never had to endure
Black clothes
Mohawks
Goatees
Shaved heads
Doc Martins
Hi tops
Hard core metal with angry lyrics about shit you never had to endure
Age-ism
The N word
Arguing about who can and cannot say the N word
Clintons
Bushes
Red v. Blue
Cynicism
Christian-bashing
Fox News
The Daily Show
Smugness
Hypocrisy
Accusing others of hypocrisy
14 miles to the gallon
Bumper stickers about your faith/lack of faith
Illiteracy
Short attention spans
Texting
Self-aggrandizement
YourBook
MyFace
Hookin’ up
Kids having kids
Leaving your wife & kids
Binge
Ingratitude
Bling
Virtual
Viral
Reality shows
American Idol
Dawg
Ho
Ennui
Disaffection
Affecting disaffection
Taking offense
Aggression
Your bad-ass stance…

All of this junk is PLAYED!

It’s all, what?—ten, fifteen, twenty, thirty years old now? It’s over…

Do you really need a 40-something to point this out to you?

Everything must go…

Timber!

This call came in on the morning of Labor Day: An old and very tall pine tree toppled onto this single story home, crashing right through the master bedroom, where the sole occupant was sleeping.

See if you can find the bed in this picture...Hint: It's right there under the ceiling fan!

Miraculously, she self-extricated, with only a few minor lacerations and abrasions.

An hour later, when I made a quick search of her room to recover her laptop and cell phone, the huge tree was still creaking and groaning.

But I noticed that her house now had a wonderful pine-fresh scent to it.

Get Serious!

That idiot over at Switch 2 Plan B has pledged to post nothing but "happy thoughts" for the next 30 days! Can you believe that?

He'll never make it...

Until he comes back down to reality, his readers are going to need some comic relief, so we here at EMG (Everything Must Go) are going to serve it up!

Enjoy!